Category Archives: Training Wild Elephants

Mindful Awareness – Week 6 Offering Honest Compliments

Week 5 , Mindful Eating, knocked me for a loop for many reasons. Because I wanted to spend more time with it, I decided to give myself room to breathe on that topic as it triggered issues that I needed way more than 5 days to walk through, and will come back to it when I know it is right.

This week, Offering Honest Compliments, was one that I really enjoyed. Many moons ago I struggled with this topic a great deal. Being offered a compliment wasn’t something I was comfortable with and I quickly deflected it back to the giver. Looking back on it now, it is crystal clear that my behavior was a reflection of my own feeling of insignificance, which I still struggle with. The big difference now though, is that I have taught myself to accept graciously compliments that are given and give compliments without the fear of them being rejected or deflected.

Compassion plays a role here I believe. When I found myself offering authentic compliments to certain people, especially when it came to helping them identify their own unique gifts, it was obvious when a person was tied to that insignificance. My heart went out to them because I have been there. I think, especially in relation to my own faith, that God has given me the insight to identify this and help others see that their insignificance is unwarranted. Sometimes I believe we are meant to be stewards in this regard. When others doubt themselves, we are meant to stand in the gap for them and help them change their lenses.

This week wasn’t without it’s challenges though. I often find myself dwelling on the “Must Get Dones” in regard to my son, rather than focusing on the beauty and progress that he is making in his daily life. I feel great guilt over this and it will be one of the “Stay Mindful Tasks” that I will continue to work on. I have even written a reminder in a place that I can’t forget or ignore, right on my hand, so that when I reach out physically, I know to reach out spiritually as well.

I wonder if you are comfortable with compliments or not. How do you feel about them?

This coming week our topic is “Mindful Posture” and it will be one I tie into last weeks of “Mindful Eating.” Looking forward to the challenge of touching some inner tough spots for sure.

Mindful Awareness Week 4 – Appreciating My Hands

Week 4 – Appreciating My Hands

Hands. Fingers. Fingernails. Skin. Wrinkles. 

As much as I depend on these two hands of mine it is true, I don’t stop and give a ton of thought into being appreciative of them. This week our challenge was to make a special effort to consider the importance of our two hands. 

I gave this a good bit of thought at first, I mean, I paused and considered how to look at my hands this week through different eyes. I wanted to ‘see’ my hands as separate entities so that I could gain some insight in to just how vitally important they are. To do this, I decided to use a strategy I loved back in the day of when I taught elementary school. I used my Wonder Cards. 

Mini Wonder Cards

Wonder Cards are simply a way to organize information about a topic, in preparation for writing a paper about it. My Wonder Question was “Why Are My Hands So Significant?” Once I knew my Wonder Question, I made cards asking more detailed questions that would truly give me a complete perspective about my hands. These are the ‘Mini-Questions’ I asked myself:

1. What function do my hands mainly serve?

2. How do those functions affect my daily life?

3. What causes my hands to change over time?

4. Does the appearance of my hands stir emotions? Why?

5. What do I love/hate about them?

6. How would my life change without them?

7. How do my hands affect others? 

As I began to answer these mini-questions I realized my answers were too easy, too obvious. I wanted to think through them, to challenge my intellect and approach this topic out of the box, so I began to research a few things. 

I attempted to complete tasks using no hands. 

I asked people questions about their own hands. 

I looked back through my photographs to see if hands were significant enough to have been photographed.

I studied the form and function of their anatomy. 

I pampered my hands and showed them love. 

I listed inward and outward factors that altered my hands. 

I meditated, pondered, and considered how my hands were used as instruments of peace or instruments of hate. 

As each day went by, I became acutely aware at just how significant they are. Not simply from a use point of view, but from an attachment point of view. This exercise stirred emotions I was not aware of, like how important it is that I see my mothers and fathers fingers in my hands, and the connection I feel when I see that. It also made me value their ability to show love to my hubs, my child, and myself in a physical way simply by touch. When I realized how much I hated certain parts of my hands, but loved others, it made me understand a lot more of how I see myself and how I perceive that others see me. This all was enlightening. 

After all the reflection, research, writing, drawing, and thinking about my hands I felt that I could answer my Wonder Question with greater insight than I had expected. Here is what I learned: 

My hands are used to create beauty.

As a matter of function, they rule.  They hold, caress, grip, stroke, tap, tinker, and take apart the tiniest parts of my life and allow the largest parts to exists. Without them, I would lose many of the juicy tidbits about life that I love. They hold the reflection of who I am, where I come from, and the promise of where I am headed. My hands are the vessels that allow me to express beauty, love, and emotions which show the best of me and the worst of me. They speak, they feed, they nourish my days through fragile moments and at times, with great strength. My hands are beautifully made, connected to my mind and heart, and by my choice can serve as agents of peace or agents of madness. They never act alone. My hands are significant, because without them, my ability to live as a Creative would be affected beyond measure. As hands are measures of time as well, I am deeply grateful to understand their connection with that greater consciousness. May I value them always, and choose to use them to share beauty, never to harm. 

My hands are the keys to unlocking who I am.